Friday, November 27, 2009

A Head Scratcher

So I have been pondering something for a few weeks now of an encounter me and Biddle (my roommate) had a few weeks back. We were at the As Tall As Lions and Mute Math concert (which was stinkin' awesome by the way!) and as we were trying to decide what to eat, a homeless man name Derrick came up to us to help us out. We knew right away what his motives were. He wanted to show us a good place to eat so that we would give him a few dollar bills. Well, as we were walking behind him, we noticed that he walked with a significant limp. I immediately felt that the Lord wanted to heal him...because God is good like that! Amen?!

Anyway, we reached our destination (some diner down by the Tabernacle) and Derrick asked for some change so he could go down to Hooters and eat some wings. We approached him and asked what happened to his leg. He proceeded to tell us that when he was younger he got shot in the leg and has walked with a limp ever since. Biddle and I both shared the Gospel with him and that God, in His vast goodness, grace and mercy, wanted to heal him. We asked if we could pray for him because the Lord WANTED to heal him right then and there. Then, much to my surprise, he said no, but repeatedly asked us for some money so he could go down to Hooters! What?! We said that what the Lord wanted to do that very moment was SO much better than a few dollars; yet, he still said no! He would rather go to a restaurant full of debauchery instead of having the power of God rush over his body and be able to walk normally without any pain! I just don't get it?! Maybe some of you can offer some insight...my only guess is that the enemy has a hold over him and has blinded his eyes to God's goodness and mercy. The Word says that the whole world is under the control of the evil one (1 John 5:19). Or maybe it was just too foolish for him to imagine that he could be healed that very instant? Because the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing (1 Corinthians 1:18). The cross, where everything was purchased (our salvation, our healing, our power, our lifeline, our reconciliation to God, etc), was foolishness to him...

So again, I just don't get it...thoughts? So we prayed for him as we continued to walk to the restaurant that the Lord would heal his leg. And again I ask right now, Lord, for Your glory and for Your fame, will you heal Derrick now in the Name of Jesus. Lord move in power right now in his life, bring healing, bring restoration and I ask that salvation would spring up from the ground so that his name may be written in the Book of Life! In Jesus Name...

Grace and peace

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Long overdue

Hello all (or all 2). I feel like I am a broken record when I say that it has been a long time since I last blogged. So kill me. A lot has been going on, but I will start off with the mission trip to Scotland. I've had several people ask me to post a synopsis. I will do my best to summarize and hit the key points without being too long-winded!

Where to start?? Ok, let's start with some of the miracles that happened while we were there. A young man, let's call him Thad (random I know but go with me) hurt his back during the obstacle course on Wednesday where he could barely stand up, walk, his ribs hurt and he could barely breathe. Leading up to this, the Lord was definitely moving in his heart. Anyway, we stopped the obstacle course and prayed for Thad. Immediately his ribs stopped hurting and he could get a full breath of air, but his back was still hurting and he couldn't walk. We pressed in harder in prayer and I had my hand on his back. As we prayed, I literally felt his back move, almost as if the Lord was realigning his back. When we finished, he was able to walk back to his room and the next morning had ZERO pain. Praise the Lord! The next story is about a girl named, we'll call her Lucy. She had been dealing with an injured leg for several years, so much so she could not run or do the activities she was used to doing (sports, etc). One night during worship (Tuesday I believe), some of our team prayed for her and took her outside to test her leg. Before then she could only run a very small distance before her leg would start hurting. After they prayed, she was able to run all over the grounds there without any pain or discomfort! She even ran the obstacle course the next night! Praise be! The other miracle that happened during the week was that several of the youth there gave their lives to the Lord. They realized that God was real and He loves them with an unending, unrelenting love! All of heaven was rejoicing (having a party) in heaven over these youth!

Worship. Was. Intense! Every year the Lord blows me away in His goodness when it comes to how He is so faithful to show up during worship! He completely honors His promise that if we draw near to Him, He will draw near to us. Before we left, a very good friend of mine prayed over me and prophesied that the songs that we will sing will be songs directly from His heart. Fast forward to Tuesday of camp. That day I was taking a walk with Lord, talking and listening to see what He wanted to do during worship. As I walked, the Lord laid on my heart several songs He wanted me to do. Excellent, right? Well...not so much. You see, the songs HE wanted me to do were very intense songs. These songs had full bands...we had me on a guitar, 2 BV vocals and a beginner percussionist (who did great for being thrown into the fire so to speak! - Way to go Walker!). So how was I going to pull off a set list consisting of songs that almost have to have a full band. The set list included You Never Let Go by Matt Redman, Awakening and Like a Lion by Daniel Bashta and The Anthem by Jake Hamilton. Intense, huh? I was talking with Tom Tanner before the service started and I told him that the worship was either going to be amazing or it was going to be a complete bust! I prayed and pleaded for Him to show up because if He doesn't, it was going to be really bad. Well I'm sure you know how the story ends...the Lord definitely showed up! It was as if the Holy Spirit provided the energy a full band would provide. We worshipped in complete unity how God has not forgotten Scotland (more specifically, the youth of Scotland) and how a light is definitely coming! Then we joined together and sang prophetically how God was bringing an awakening to that nation and how heaven is roaring over Scotland and revival is going to fall! Then came the most intense song of the night. Here are some of the words:

"Wake up child, it's your time to shine. You were born for such a time as this."

"This is the anthem of our generation! Here we are God, shake our nation!"

"I am royalty, I have destiny, I have been set free, I'm gonna shape history!"

Can I get an amen??!!

Then, after Tom spoke we had some great ministry time. After a few songs into it, heaven came even closer. The time was around 11:30 pm and "lights out" was supposed to be at midnight. I asked the leaders what they wanted to do...keep going or end it. Then some of the youth started yelling out "worship!" For the next hour and a half or so, we worshipped and danced all over the meeting hall, crying out for this generation!! It was beautiful!!!

Afterwards, the pastor of the church we partner with came up to me with tears in his eyes. Listen to this...he tells me that when I started singing "wake up child, it's your time to shine" the Holy Spirit overwhelmed him. He said it was as if we were singing the heart of God!! That was word for word what my friend prophesied over me before I left! Man how the Lord is faithful!

Worship the rest of the week was equally as amazing. I hit just some of the highlights. Scotland is near and dear to my heart. Even more so to the Lord! Revival is coming to Scotland (again) and it will be a burning flame engulfing the hearts of both young and old alike. I believe it with all of my heart. I love those youth and cannot wait to see them again. Greater things are still to be done in their hearts and in Scotland!!

Grace and peace.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Scotland here I come...

So in a few short hours (9 to be exact) I will be leaving with a team of 20 others to Paisley, Scotland to put on a youth camp. This will be year number 3 that we have done this. I am super excited about going back! Seeing old faces and meeting new ones. The Lord has BIG things in store for this camp. This youth. This country. Be praying for us as we go overseas and partner with God's heart to bring revival (again) to Scotland. We believe (like truly believe) it is coming and it is coming through the youth of Scotland.

If you want to check out more of what we are doing in Scotland (more importantly what the Lord is doing in Scotland), then check out the BLOG.


You will also be able to watch the services online through the blog. So hopefully everyone will tune in!

Alrighty folks, can't wait to share what the Lord is going to do over the next couple weeks! Until then....

Grace and peace.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Potential

The Lord has been doing some pretty interesting and sweet things in my life recently. I'm not going to bore you with all of them but I do want to share some thoughts that I've had recently [or that the Lord has given me].

The word potential has been a key word lately. This word has both positive and negative connotations attached to it. The positive side is usually associated with younger children or teenagers. "Bobby Sue has so much potential...". On the flip side, the negative aspect of the word potential typically is used when talking about older folks. "Stan had all of that potential but blew it when he did...(fill in the blank)".

I will add a third category of potential...Kingdom potential. This goes much farther than your Kingdom destiny or calling. Here's how: In Genesis 1 and 2, God gave Adam the authority over everything on earth. Genesis 1:26: "...let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground." God then put the man in charge of the Garden of Eden [2:15], which to me is a HUGE responsibility. Man was in charge of the grounds where God walked and talked! Anyway, in chapter 3 we read where Adam and Eve are deceived and the fall of man occurs. Adam had all of the potential yet he blew it! He had authority over everything and in one decision he brought a curse to mankind.

Now the rest of the Old Testament was God setting up the coming of His One and Only Son [the "Second Adam" - read 1 Corinthians 15 and Romans 5] to come and fulfill all of the potential the first Adam had and lost. Jesus walked with the authority of heaven...perhaps the same authority Adam could have had. Read all through the Gospels and you read where Jesus healed every sickness and disease, cast out demons, set the captives free, made blind eyes see, made deaf ears hear, turned water into wine, walked on water and so on and so on.

Now we, as co-heirs with Christ [Romans 8:17] and who walk with the same power and authority Jesus did, are called to fulfill all of the potential the first Adam had [just like Jesus]. It is in my opinion that God is raising up a generation that are to be known as "fulfillers of the Kingdom potential." A generation that will encompass believers walking down the streets performing signs and wonders through the Holy Spirit. Some will be preaching the Gospel with the fire of heaven in their bones and unction in their words. To some, the gift of worship and prophetic singing is released. To others, prophetic utterances and words of knowledge. And some, because of their unquenchable love for Jesus, will become martyrs for their faith.

However, this is not just for some. Every Believer is called to fulfill this potential. But to do so, we need to live by the culture of the Kingdom, not by the culture of this world. No longer can we tolerate the things of this world [abortion, murder, slander, gossip, fornication, idolatry, etc]. We must live by the culture and value system of the Kingdom of God that is soon coming. This value system is found in chapters 5-7 in Matthew's Gospel. Billy Humphrey of IHOP-Atlanta says that these chapters not only describe what Jesus is like, but they also describe what Jesus likes! These chapters unveil God's heart.

There are 8 core values of the Kingdom which are described in the Beatitudes. We must be poor in spirit knowing that Jesus is all that we need and that He alone provides for us. We must be ones who mourn [or long and ache] for His return just as Jesus longs and aches to be reunited with His Bride. We must be a humble people. We must hunger and thirst for righteousness, holiness and the pleasures of God. We must be a forgiving people full of mercy. We must live lives of purity and not condone the acts of this world. We have to be a people that bring peace and live a life full of peace because this world is about to get a little hairy during the end of this age. And beloved, we must be prepared to be persecuted. A time is coming [and has already come] where many are ridiculed, beaten and put to death for their belief in Christ. In fact, more people have died because of their faith in the past 100 years than have died in the previous 1900 combined!

We must be cheerful givers and lovers of the secret place with God. We must be a people that bow our hearts and bend our knees to seek the face of God in prayer, fasting and supplication. In doing so, we will undoubtedly hear the voice of God and learn what is burning on His heart for today.

So I encourage each and everyone of you to study chapters 5-7 of Matthew. Take it slow. Digest it. I also recommend Billy Humphrey's book, "The Culture of the Kingdom." It is a valuable resource and study guide for the value system of the Kingdom of God.

Grace and peace.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Hilarious!!!

As a little comedic interlude between Revelation discussions, check out this amazingly funny bit from a comedian named Brian Regan. If you haven't heard of him, do yourself a favor and search him on youtube and watch some of his clips. You might have to change your underwear....




Grace and peace.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Conclusion of Revelation 1

Alright, so we are down to the final 2 verses of Revelation 1:

"Write, therefore, what you have seen, what is now and what will take place later. The mystery of the seven stars that you saw in my right hand and of the seven golden lampstands is this: The seven stars are the angels of the seven churches, and the seven lampstands are the seven churches."

Growing up, or I guess I should say, in my early years of being a Believer, I always avoided reading the book of Revelation. I avoided it because I thought there was way too much symbolism for me to understand. But as I've studied it recently, I've realized that yes, there are a bunch of symbolic figures and visions, BUT I've found that most of them are explained right in the text. And we are seeing that here. In these 2 verses, Jesus is explaining to John what the vision of the seven stars and the seven golden lampstands are. A few verses earlier John sees "someone 'like a son of man'" walking among the lampstands and having seven stars "in his right hand."

The seven stars, according to Jesus, are the "angels of the seven churches." The word angels could also mean "messengers." Now there are 2 explanations for the word "angels" [or messengers]: It could be taken literally and that these seven churches actually had angels assigned [I guess that's the right word?] to their churches. Then I guess you can assume that there could be angels assigned to churches in today's time? The other possible explanation is that the word messenger refers to the pastors/preachers that are over the churches. I tend to go more with this explanation, but that's just me...

One of the most encouraging parts of this vision is Jesus ["son of man" - which is how Daniel described the person in his vision recorded in Daniel 7] walking among the lampstands. Here we can imagine Jesus walking between each lampstand, probably stopping by each one with a smile on His face. Maybe He reaches out and places His hand on the lampstand. You see, Jesus longs to be with His church, loves to reach out and touch His church, and for sure He loves it when His church welcomes Him in. The sad part is that there are many churches out there that have four walls, but Jesus is not found in them. The Holy Spirit is not taught on and He is certainly not allowed to minister. These churches are dead. They have the appearance of being alive, but in fact are quite dead. The Spirit is not living and dwelling within them! These churches have the fluff and flattery [ie. seeker-friendly] but lack the truth. It makes me so thankful to belong to a church where the Lord is free to do what He wants, when He wants and how He wants. I pray that the Lord would grab ahold of the messengers of these dead churches and put a fire in their bones to preach the Word, and to preach it boldly! If not, then it is my opinion that these will be the ones to fall away during the End Times that Jesus talks about in Matthew 24 [see also 2 Thess 2, Revelation 17]. Wake up churches!!

So I pray that wherever you are at, that Jesus would walk near you and reach out His mighty hand to touch your life exactly where you need/want Him to. I pray that you would see Him smile at you! There's nothing better...

Grace and peace.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Musings and Revelation 1 continued...

As I have been sitting by the ocean the past several days, I've been in awe of how amazing my God is! He is so infinitely huge yet comes down to man to speak to him, to encourage him and to love him...speechless! I look out into the expanse which is the Atlantic Ocean and I can't help but imagine God holding all of the water on earth in the palms of His hands...ok, that's crazy BIG!! The second thought that comes to mind is the overwhelming knowledge that God thinks about me; that He has engraved my name on the palm of His hands (Isaiah 49:16) and His heart is ravished when He sees my name and when our eyes meet. Psalm 139 comes to mind as I sit on the beach:

"How precious to me are Your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand."

Ok, I'm not always good at math, but that is a LOT of thoughts. So today I did a little experiment. I picked up a handful of sand on the beach and I tried to count the grains (I wouldn't call that being bored, just taking a break from reading and trying to bring this Scripture to life!). The key word here is "tried." I was about 1/500th of the way through the sand in my hand and I was already higher than I've ever counted before, plus I'm not accounting for all the grains of sand that sifted through my fingers! And the Lord just quietly and gently encouraged me, "I love you, my thoughts for you and only you outnumber the grains of sand on every beach on earth...and each one is good and makes me smile!" The unfathomable beauty of it all is that He can say that about each and every person...and that includes you!!

The third thought that came rushing through my mind happened yesterday while I was out surfing. I sat out there watching wave after wave come in, some I rode while others I just floated over and watched as the white water refreshed the seashore. The Lord said, "A wave is coming. A wave that has never been seen before in history. It is going to be big and powerful, but if you love me and rest in me, you are going to see it coming and building. But, will you ride it with me or will you just watch? You can't control the wave. You must surrender to its power and let it take you." Wow! As we study Revelation, we see that a new, fresh, never-seen-before wave is coming (and is coming soon!). Many are going to see this wave and either just sit and watch or they are going to get out of the water altogether. A few are going to see this wave coming and are going to get excited about the possibilities. Just as a wave breaks and refreshes the seashore with new grains of sand, in the same way this Wave is bringing with it restoration and renewal. The Wave is bringing with it the Kingdom of heaven to earth!! It is going to be powerful and it is going to be scary, but I can promise you it is going to be exhilarating and for lack of a better word, good.

So how does this relate to Revelation 1? Well in verses 12-18 John vividly describes his vision of Jesus. It is the same vision Ezekiel (Ezekiel 1), Isaiah (Isaiah 6) and Daniel (Daniel 10) had. This Wave that is coming is bringing with it a clear Revelation of who Jesus is! A Jesus that is "dressed in a robe reaching down to His feet and with a golden sash around His chest." A Jesus whose "head and hair were white like wool, as white as snow, and His eyes were like blazing fire...feet like burning bronze in a furnace." And this last description brings it back full circle, "And His voice was like the sound of rushing waters." A voice that is so thunderous and full of power that every other noise is drowned out. Imagine Niagara Falls multiplied by I don't know, some high number! : )

One of my blog posts would not be complete if I didn't mention something that relates to worship. This vision and portrayal of Jesus is one that most of us don't regularly think of. Let's be honest, when I think of Jesus, I see a caucasian male with a beard, wearing sandals and a smile. This may be true and all, but when we come into a worship setting, we need to have the same picture of Jesus that John (and others) describes. A picture of royalty and majesty; of power and of someone that shines brilliantly with glory and light! We need to focus on Him majestically walking throughout the aisles of your church with a double-edged sword bursting forth from His mouth ready to pierce our very beings and change us for eternity! I'll wager a bet and say that our worship experience will be completely altered once we have this image etched into our minds and hearts. Agree?

Anyway, thanks for reading my random musings...until next time...

Grace and peace.

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Revelation 1

Ok I'm back and we are on a mission. We are going to go through the book of Revelation, starting from the beginning. Well...at least I hope to go through every chapter. I may skip around a little bit...don't hate me!

We are going to start by looking at the first half of chapter 1...

It is important to understand first that the book of Revelation was written about things present and about the things to come...both in the near future and in the distant future. The first 3 chapters are written about the things present.

In verse 1 John addresses one of the things I cannot stand right off the bat..."The revelation of Jesus Christ...". Like I've said before, this book is about only ONE revelation...the Revelation of Jesus Christ! This is not the book of RevelationS. That's one of my pet-peeves (spelling?). I literally cringe when someone says Revelations instead of Revelation. The main focus of this book is to reveal the Father's heart for the Bridegroom (Jesus) to be reunited with His bride (us, the church), and for us to come to the realization that we must fall deeply in love with Jesus!

Verse 3: "Blessed is the one who reads the words of this prophecy, and blessed are those who hear it and take to heart what is written in it, because the time is near."

There are 3 crucial things a Believer MUST do when it comes to this book: 1) Read it; 2) Hear it; and 3) Take it to heart. The last imperative there means that this book must alter how we live our lives. Believers have to take this book to heart and change the way they live. We must live as love-sick brides longing for the return of our Bridegroom!

Verse 4: "...Grace and peace to you from Him who is, and who was, and who is to come, and from the seven spirits before His throne." The "seven spirits" is also translated "sevenfold Spirit." So what is the "seven spirits?" We find the answer in Isaiah 11:2, which states, "The Spirit of the Lord will rest on Him (Jesus) - the Spirit of wisdom (1) and of understanding (2), the Spirit of counsel (3) and of power (4), the Spirit of knowledge (5) and of the fear of the Lord (6) - and He will delight in the fear of the Lord (7)."

Verse 5: "...and from Jesus Christ, who is the faithful witness, the firstborn from the dead, and the ruler of the kings of the earth." The firstborn of the dead refers to Jesus being the first One ever to be resurrected from the dead and who is the King of Kings. He will soon rule over the entire earth with His iron sceptor and every knee will bow and tongue confess that He is Lord of heaven and of earth.

We will skip down to verse 7 which describes Jesus' descension and earthly procession:

"Look, He is coming with the clouds, and every eye will see Him, even those who pierced Him; and all the peoples of the earth will mourn because of Him. So shall it be! Amen." The Bible tells us that Jesus is going to return the same way He left. After He was resurrected and walk the earth with His disciples, it says that Jesus ascended up into the clouds. So, we know that this is the same way He is going to return...with the clouds. When He does this, every eye is going to see Him. To me this is crazy to even think about and there are opinions being tossed back and forth as to how this is going to actually look. Some say that every person on earth is going to see Jesus at the same time. I know that He is God in the flesh, but this seems rather hard to process. It is hard to imagine that every living person on planet earth is going to see Him at the same time.

I have a thought of my own here (well maybe not my own but it's backed by Scripture). In Malachi 1, verse 11 it says, "My name will be great among the nations, from the rising to the setting of the sun." It is the rising and setting of the sun that serves as a symbol of how Jesus' triumphal procession is going to look!

Want another reference? Psalm 19:4-6

"In the heavens he has pitched a tent for the sun, which is like a bridegroom coming forth from his pavilion, like a champion rejoicing to run his course. It rises at one end of the heavens and makes its circuit to the other; nothing is hidden from its heat." The bold there is to emphasize my point. This basically says that the sun is our day-to-day example of how the bridegroom is going to run his course when He comes again! To maybe try and make more sense of this, take for example the sun rising. Nowadays, the sun rises around say 6:30 in the morning here in Georgia. In California, the sun rises at around the same time; and the same goes for people in Hawaii, Australia, India, etc. So in essence, we will all see Jesus at the same time, but not at the exact same time. Make sense?! I hope it does.

And I would love to hear your thoughts!!

In that same verse it says that "all the peoples of the earth will mourn because of Him." This may have several meanings. One may be the type of mourning described in Matthew 5. "Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." We as Believers must mourn (ie. long or ache) for His return, and we will be comforted when we see Him coming on the clouds because we would have just gone through the worst time period in history...the Great Tribulation. Also, people are going to mourn because they know their names are not written in the book of life and they are now going to spend eternity in hell, apart from Jesus.

Can I just say here that I cannot imagine how crazy unbelievable His return or procession is going to be. Imagine now the Son of Man, riding on the clouds in all of His glory with all of the resurrected bodies with Him, cruising around the earth! Man, it gives me chill bumps even thinking about it now. Since Jesus is fully man (and fully God), one would have to think that the cloud He is riding on will have to be close enough to the ground in order for us to recognize Him...maybe? Thoughts?

Jesus then is quoted in verse 8: "I am the Alpha and the Omega...who is, and who was, and who is to come, THE Almighty." We all know that Alpha is the first letter of the Greek alphabet and Omega is the last letter of the alphabet. So Jesus is saying here that He was the first (He was there WITH God before the creation of the universe - John 1) and He is the last (He is coming back to reign forever). Jesus then sums it all up by saying that He is THE ALMIGHTY! There is none like Him; none past, present or future. He is above ALL! He is so completely other!

So there you go, the start of our study of the book of Revelation. Again, I would love to hear your thoughts and comments as we proceed.

Until next time...

Grace and peace.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

A must needed "pause"

I've been out of the blogging world for the past week or so, but it has been such a needed and sweet time for me. During my time away, I've dealt with...no actually, the Lord has gotten rid of...a lot of misconceptions [and lies] I've had about life and myself. I must say here how refreshing, joyous and life-giving it is to hear the Lord speak to you and speak encouragement and truth over you!! There is nothing better in this world...His love is better than life! How many of us can honestly say this; that deep within our very being we know and walk in this very truth? For a while I knew it in my head but there was a big chasm between my head and my heart. Anybody out there feeling me on this?! BUT, the Lord totally mended a secretly broken heart...man, I feel alive again!

So I will give a huge shout-out to the SOZO ministry and to the amazing leaders and ministers of His truth and grace at Riverstone! If you don't know what SOZO is, then check it out at Bethel Church's website [from Redding, California -- Bill Johnson's church] or at Riverstone's website [www.riverstoneonline.org]. Every believer needs to do this! If you have baggage, and let's be honest...we all do, then you definitely need to check this out and sign up for a session. You will leave there hearing the Father's heart for you. Who wouldn't want that?! Doors of lies that the enemy has opened in your heart will be shut and walls that are keeping you from the fullness of all that God is will be torn down!! Enough said...

Alrighty then, well I will be picking back up with some discussions on the End Times. We will go over some chapters in Revelation and maybe hit Daniel up another time or two. So stay tuned...all of the 3 readers out there!

Grace and peace.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Honesty is the best policy...so I've heard...

James 1:5 - "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him."


I'm just going to be honest with y'all right now...I need some wisdom seriously. The past month or so has been one of the weirdest and toughest seasons of my life! I know there is a light at the end of this tunnel of apparent darkness (or maybe cloudiness is the best word) and I know that I will look back at this one day and say, "Oh so that's what You were doing!" However, in midst of the mire and muck, I find myself easily discouraged and easily frustrated and maybe I'm not so fun to be around (I don't know, you will have to ask those that hang out with me...). But seriously, it has been a season where a lot of the things I felt so sure about and so confident in, have been in a way taken from me. Or I guess the best way to put it is that things are not working out how I thought they would. Yes, yes I know what I just said and I am not claiming that I run my own life. Nor am I saying that I don't trust God's sovereignty or His leadership...I'm just being real.

Right now (and maybe some of you out there) I am struggling to find my role in a number of different situations (church, worship, relationships, etc). I'm the kind of personality that thrives on feeling value. I need affirmation. Lately, that has been lacking. Maybe it's just a season where I'm taught to find my true value in Him, or maybe it's an attack from the enemy. Whatever the root, I'm constantly trying to remind myself that God likes me! God likes me! Hey in case you forgot, God likes you!

There are moments where I wish it could be like the movie Click where Adam Sandler fast forwarded through all of the bad stuff and only lived out the good stuff. But where would the lesson be? And where would the refining and purification be? It would be just a thing that happened with no deep-rooted, heart transforming revelation. I don't want that! I need a revelation. I need wisdom from the Lord.

Ephesians 1:17 - "I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know Him better."

So God, that is my prayer. I'm asking for wisdom and revelation. I want to know You better. I want to know the purpose behind this season better. I need wisdom that can only come from You. You promised to give it to us IF we ask for it. Your move.

(Note: I'm not angry or bitter)

Grace and peace.