Is that even a word?! Well, for those of you who read this (again I'm sticking by 1-2 people) and are wondering what the "h" the title means, today was the day where those who applied for a residency position to become specialized in a particular genre of veterinary medicine found out if they matched or not. And I'm sure y'all are smart enough to pull from the title that I did not match...for the 3rd year in a row. I'll admit I wasn't too hopeful this year, but it's still disappointing to get rejected. I don't do well with rejection...I'm sure you can ask those who used to be close to me and they'll agree (key word being "used" - that's where the word rejection fits in). Even though I wasn't hopeful that this hail-marry residency pass would be completed, I had a feeling that this might be my year. I only applied to 3 places (out of 7 in the country) - UGA, Univ of Florida and NC State. I thought I had a good chance at UGA since I went there...wrong. My mentor at Georgia Veterinary Specialists where I did my internship went to Florida for his residency, so I thought I had an "in" there...wrong again. NC State was kind of a long shot, but I had a fairly good interview with them 2 years ago...and so there was "no" number 3. So I'm done. No more emotional roller-coasters for me. It'll take me a few days to get over this rejection, but then I'll start to look at the brighter side of it. Being rejected for 3 years in a row simply means that God has something better in-store for me. It probably has to do with worship...not probably, it does. I will say that if I had gotten a position somewhere, then I would have had to drop out of the mission trip to Scotland (even though I'm not too keen on going right now anyway - hey I'm just being honest; I don't want to be fake blogger...or a flogger. God just needs to add a few more guys to the trip, that's all). Also, the skies the limit for The Fourth Man, and I would have little to no extra free time to play music or lead worship if I was a resident. And by the way, my next blog will have some new pictures from our latest "gig" up at Camp Glisson.
"All a man's ways seem innocent to him, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails" (Proverbs). So His purpose is prevailing in my life. Everything I try to do for the most part fails. The plans He has for me are such deep waters and are so good. What's that phrase? I can't see the forest from the trees? Is that right? Well that's how I feel. Sometimes I lose sight of the greater because of the lesser that is being burned away or pruned away in my life. The "lesser" is what I thought was good in my life. He promises to shake everything that can be shaken. God is so grand and big and majestic! Stars come out of his mouth and He knows them by name, each and every one of them. In the beginning light came out of His mouth! Ponder those 2 sentences a minute and try to wrap your mind around how BIG God is! The billions and billions of stars that are in the universe; stars that are 100-1000x the size of our little planet earth, came out of His mouth! I mean, come on, we serve a BIG God! Yet, He's a God that wants to be intimate. He's infinite and intimate. He cares for me, He cares for you, He cares for us! He gathers His sheep and pulls them close to His heart...how beautiful is this picture?! So whom am I to question? Whom am I to say, "are you sure God?" I just need to trust Him, which I do, wholeheartedly. I've heard it said, "Wherever you are, be all there!" So that's what I'm going to do. For now (and I do stress for now), where I'm at is Marietta, GA. I honestly don't see myself living here for too much longer. When I say that, I mean in the 1-2 year time frame. Until I get called elsewhere, I pledge to be all here! My God is faithful and sovereign. People will let you down...I know this full well, but God will never leave or forsake you. People will change right in front of your eyes...but God never changes; He is the same yesterday, today and forever. Plans will fail and what you thought was going to be, won't be. I just need to set my heart and eyes on the eternal, on things heavenly (because everything else is temporary and will be shaken). I need a little more of the intimate God right now. I need to be led by the still waters so He can restore my soul. I am moved and quieted by this, "I am my Beloved's and His desire is for me."
Hey trees, get out of my way!
Grace and peace.