Thursday, March 22, 2007

Zeal where are you?

I am in a dry land right now... a desert if you will. Today it hit me, I haven't spent quality time with the Lord, about a month! What I mean by quality time is actually sitting down in my secret place, worshipping, reading and digesting His Word, and listening. To be real and transparent with you guys, I haven't had the desire to do it. I can try to pin it on me being busy this month, working overnight shifts, etc. But it just stems from a lack of zeal right now. It's been over a month since I studied the book of Colossians, which if you don't know, God placed it on my heart to in-depthly study this book after the Passion 07 Conference. Is this an attack from the enemy? Maybe. Is it just a period I'm going through? Maybe. Whatever the cause, the result is the to Him. Lately I've settled and become content on the emptiness and blah-ness. I've become comfortable going through the motions. I lack good Christian guy fellowship. I need encouragement and accountability.

BUT, our God is faithful. His heart is moved at the site of one of His children pressing in during times of drought to seek Him and worship Him. He rejoices over our responding to the "yes" inside of us. I need a fresh wind to blow in and through me. I need a fresh water to refresh my soul. I need the breath of God to blow on my coals. I want to feel His gaze, and feel the warmth and strength of His embrace. He is beckoning me to come to His table. So that's where I'll go. I'm reminded of the amazing song by Leeland called Carried to the Table. Here are the lyrics:
Wounded and forsaken
I was shattered by the fall
Broken and forgotten
Feeling lost and all alone
Summoned by the King
Into the Master’s courts
Lifted by the Savior
And cradled in His arms
I was carried to the table
Seated where I don’t belong
Carried to the table
Swept away by His love
And I don’t see my brokenness anymore
When I’m seated at the table of the Lord
I’m carried to the table
The table of the Lord

Fighting thoughts of fear
And wondering why He called my name
Am I good enough to share this cup
This world has left me lame
Even in my weakness
The Savior called my name
In His Holy presence
I’m healed and unashamed

You carried me, my God You
carried me

Deuteronomy 33:12

Let the beloved of the Lord rest secure in Him,
for He shields him all day long,
and the one the Lord loves rests between His
Can you visualize that last line? Here is what I see after I read that verse: I see God sitting down on the floor leaning against the wall or sofa with his legs straight out. Then I see me sitting between his legs with my back to His chest. His arms then wrap around me...I'm resting between His shoulders. There's no where else I'd rather be.
He is summoning me to His table and He is waiting to be able to cradle me in His arms. Oh sweet love. The cry in my heart is to be swept away by His love. At His table we don't see our brokenness anymore, we don't see our fears anymore, we don't see our insecurities anymore, or our weaknesses anymore. Here at His table, our healing and wholeness are found. Here the Lord places a banner of love over us.

Grace and peace.

No comments: